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| French Elle, Janvier 18, 2013. |
The bold headline in red with an exclamation point says: Mariage pour toutes!
The issue has pages of dresses, makeup ideas and wedding rings which we understand are there for every woman. Also inside is an article about love between two women (or girls actually if one translates the headline word for word), Comment S'Aiment Les Filles? The piece poses the question, "what are the dreams of young lesbians, fidelity, marriage. . ." and more.
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| One of the photographs accompanying the article. |
Marriage, they were saying is the institution in which children have a mother and a father. The word itself, mariage, they maintained, has only one definition.
As I said in the headline, I'm reporting the facts as I know them. What fascinated me was Elle, but then again it has always been a magazine that likes controversy and supports feminism no matter how a woman defines the concept.
Personally, I try to avoid controversy whenever possible. You're probably wondering then, "why did she write this post?" Because it's news, because it's part of today's society and culture no matter where one stands on the subject.
19 comments:
Nothing wrong with a bit of controversy, it encourages debate and that in turn is always a good thing in my opinion. xo
And, you've reminded us that the U.S. is not alone in struggling with these questions. I wonder what the American version of Elle looks like? May need to go check ...
Tish, you rock. Thank you for posting this.
When I first moved to France, one of the most surprising things was how much homophobia was still present in the society. I was sick to my stomach to see so many thousands marching against their fellow human beings and the reasons given why. I couldn't help but wonder if it had been a march against any other *group/race/sex, fill in the blank* if so many people would have spoken or acted as if they were so completely in the right. We are all in this together and all connected. We all deserve the right to love and to marry. Love is Love but I realize that everyone will not agree with me on that.
I seem to recall a Sex and the City episode some years back, in which Samantha remarks that she doesn't understand why single women want to be married, when so many married people would love to be single again!
I'm sure I haven't quoted this precisely, but you get the gist.
Having been married and divorced, I don't feel a need to marry again. I don't "desire" marriage, and I didn't especially when I was younger.
That said, I cherish the level of commitment (and family unit) that it seeks to construct; I only wish more people fully understood what that meant before marrying, rather than after.
Is that possible?
Another issue.
As for same sex marriage - here or anywhere - for those who truly wish to make that level of commitment - legal, public, spiritual in some way if they wish - I believe they should be allowed to do so.
My immediate response to that cover? They look too young to be heading into a theoretically life-long commitment.
And incidentally, having just watched the presidential inauguration today, President Obama clearly reflected that part of his political agenda is marriage equality.
I say bravo to that.
And to you for a little bit of "controversy."
Tish, as a fond fan of this blog, I'm eager to read your reporting on the other side of this issue (meaning those who support same-sex marriage), beyond what Elle has to say (and sell).
Before I realized, I wrote a response of essay length to this great post - it is now deleted.
Society needs to support stable, committed, loving relationships. To many, having the option of being married and being able to say “I love you and commit to you ” in public, is important. For others, both heterosexual and homosexual, it is not a significant aspect of their relationship. Each to their own. Bisous.
For the life of me, I cannot see how a homosexual marriage threatens my heterosexual one. If I am going to err, I am going to err on the side of compassion, acceptance and equal rights for all.
Is that controversial?
It is news and I'm glad you made me aware. I'm so disappointed in this tranche of France's population. I expect it of recovering puritanical countries but not from secular France.
Oh, dear. Maybe (well, no maybe about it) I'm shallow, but what really caught my eye on that cover was 'Mode:c'est le retour du 501.' Now that's what I call news. Are skinny jeans over?
Ah, c'est tellement triste!
How can so many hundreds of thousands of people deny their compatriots the same freedoms and rights that all heterosexuals take for granted.
It is interesting how many people fret so over others lives; instead of working on improving their own. If what I have been through has taught me anything; it is compassion and kindness for all.
xoxo
Karena
2013 Artists Series
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Marriage, in modern countries, is first and foremost a legal contract. I see no reason to prevent a class (in the legal sense) of consenting adults from entering into a contract if they view it as necessary to their well-being.
I felt very sad when I saw the news about these demonstrations in France. Here in largely Catholic Spain (where, yes, many are not practicing Catholics, but where the Church still has a lot of influence), the reaction to gay marriage is tolerance. Even when the conservative (PP) government considered repealing the law permitting it, its Minister of Justice found there was no legal basis to do so. Perhaps after having lived through so many years of officially-sanctioned intolerance in the form of dictatorship, some lessons have been learned after all...
Don't understand why anyone has such strong objections, it baffles me. And yes, they do seem too young to be heading into a marriage.
Wow, just wow. . . to all these comments. . .
What an encouraging series of genuinely open-minded and generous replies.
I do have to say that "biglittlewolf"s reply made me recall an interview with the essayist Fran Leibowitz.....from sometime in the 90's when "lesbian chic" was all rage/hot-topic in New York. The interviewer asked Miss Leibowitz what she thought of "Lesbian chic!". Fran stared blankly at him for a moment before flatly saying "Lesbian CHIC? I don't get it.....gays are the SQUAREST people I know. Who else is fighting to join the military and get married?"
Level Best as Ever,
David Terry...who, just for the record, would never "marry" Herve (who, in return would never marry him), but who couldn't conceive of telling another couple whether or not they could have what made them happy. I'm friends with toomany ay couples who've travelled to other states to be married (a marraige that isn't recognized here in North Carolina) and who've afterwards and repeatedly told folks how very, very much the marriage means to them.
David, that's exactly what I was thinking.
But, then, where does it stop?
A 'loving relationship' with 3 adults? Polygamy?
I could go off into other relationship tangents, but, for the sake of decorum, I won't.
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